Christmas Day in Greece

Christmas day baclava

A walk in the sun. A small gathering of family and friends. Turkey and trimmings, baclava, cheese pies. Fussing over the baby. A ship. Presents. Relaxing. Done for another year.

Words of the day

  • χρονιά πολλά – seasons greetings – (hron-ee-ah po-lah)
  • γαλοπούλα – turkey – (galla- poo -la )
  • Χριστούγεννα – Christmas – (hris-too-gen-ah)


Clouds on the horizon

Storm clouds

An apocalyptic storm cloud heads straight towards us


Predictably, life with a newborn has reduced my schedule to rubble, hence the lack of any recent action here. In the meantime, here are some pretty pictures of the amazing cloud scapes that we’re privileged to witness here in the Mani on a daily basis.

The picture above is the start of the crazy storm I wrote about last month. Enjoy!!



Words of the day

  • σύννεφο – cloud – (sin-eff-oh)
  • παραλία – beach -(para-lee-ah)

A dog’s life

Cats enjoy a fish supper

Stray cats and dogs dine well in many parts of Greece

Earlier this year, in New York, whilst on a short stroll in the uber chic Meat Packing district, I witnessed a textbook example of what can go wrong when pets are used as a surrogate for human offspring.  Alongside me a middle-aged super-glam Sex In The City type was holding an extremely pampered dog, whose cute little manicured feet had probably never touched a sidewalk. Behind her she was pulling what I could only describe as a designer doggy go-kart. Inside the little mutt-mobile were two more powdered pooches, enjoying every minute of their luxury ride. In effect the dogs seemed to be taking her out for a walk.

I was reminded of this peculiar man/beast relationship whilst out for an afternoon stroll a couple of days ago. I’m back in the Mani, and the peace of the countryside is like a warm welcoming blanket after the hectic, humid, hum of Athens. In the villages, it’s not uncommon for householders to own a few ‘pets’.  But these animals, have a very different relationship with their owners and environments than any city dwelling beasts I’ve come across.

For a start, because of the balmy climate, it’s rare for dogs or cats to be kept inside the house. Apart from the crazy ones, most of the village mutts in Mani have no need for leads, fences or other urbane restrictions. They are free to roam the streets and fields, popping in on their neighbours occasionally to sniff a bum or exchange gossip. Their human guardians are not so much ‘caring parents’, rather, ‘landlords’ who happen to provide free food as well as lodging.

Cats in Greece have even more liberties. Unlike much of the Western world, who enjoy posting pics of cute anthropomorphised moggies all over the internet, the feline of the species occupies an arguably more healthy place in the affections of Greeks. Most of the cats here are strays. But unlike your typical image of a sad, scrawny, mange-ridden creature, these strays tend to be proud, feisty, well groomed and often surprisingly fat. Stray dogs are also a common sight. At the hospital in Kalamata, several large mongrels proudly patrol the grounds like they own the place.

So in a country where resources are stretched, to say the least, you would think that there would be little love or tolerance for these four-legged waifs. On they contrary. Many Greeks seem to love cats and dogs, but not in a share-my-bed, slobber-over-my-face kind of way. Most of the strays hang around because humans actively like to feed them. Spend time at virtually any taverna or restaurant and you’ll be courted by armies of cute kittens and their parents. Tourists try to pick them up like they’re house pets, but these creatures have only one thing on their minds, your dinner. Rather than try to exterminate the cute scavengers, the proprietors tolerate them and feed them scraps from the kitchen. Likewise with the hospital dogs. They only hang around because some folk actually take the time to regularly leave food out.

In Mani, we have our own West Side Story-like gang of vagabond cats. After meals we often take our leftovers across the road, where the furry fellows hang out. But they certainly don’t depend on our good will in order to survive. If we didn’t feed them, they’d end up chasing mice, snakes or maybe a bird or two.  These semi-wild creatures have a respect for us humans as we’re seen as part of their food supply chain. But that’s where the relationship ends. Maybe I’m falling into the trap of assigning human qualities to these animals again, but just as people of the Mani have a reputation for being tough, the cats and dogs here seem to have a similar steely disposition too.

Words of the day

  • γάτα – cat – (gatta)
  • σκυλί – dog -(skill-ee)
  • εστιατόριο – restaurant – (ess-tee-o-tor-ee-o)


Cross-town blues

Mr Bump was rushed to Athens in an ambulance. Don’t worry he’s OK now.

After several blissful and uneventful days in the Kalamata Hilton, chaos has decided to pay us a visit. At the judgement of our paediatrician, our baby had to be rushed in an ambulance to a paediatric ward in Athens, a 4 hour drive away. Shortly after arriving, the little man was given the all clear, but now we are 300 km from where we planned to be, in an unfamiliar part of the city, with lots of logistical issues to deal with.

The most important thing is that our baby is now in full health, the doctor says he has a very strong heart and a loud cry – I can testify to that. But he must stay in the ward so they can run all their test and procedures. So that means making daily cross-city expeditions for breast-feeding visits and a vital supply of daily hugs.

The trip across town proves to be an eye opening insight into a seedier part of life in Athens. The old general hospital is in the down-at-heel west-side of town near the port of Piraeus. Many immigrants have flocked and settled to this ex-industrial suburb. A small patch of brown-field a couple of blocks from the hospital is home to a handful of Soweto-style shanty buildings, constructed out of scrap wood, metal and anything else vaguely suitable for building a shelter. Not exactly a part of Greece that the tourist board wants on show.

The hospital too, reflects the relative poverty of the area. Quite unlike our modern facility in Kalamata, this place is a huge, decrepit, labyrinthine building. It’s easy to get lost in the maze of corridors, some of which are reminiscent of a Victorian asylum. Although clean and well maintained, tramps have taken up residence in this air conditioned haven, trying to escape the 35 degree heat. Patients sit outside with their drips attached, chain smoking, whilst inside, visitors group together to smoke by the lifts. To add to the ambience, the staff here are (understandably) more brusque and to the point. Needless to say it’s an altogether quite uninspiring place.

The neonatal unit comes as a shock too. This fourth floor ward is cramped and stuffed back to back with incubators. Newborns and tiny premature babies lie in their clear plastic safe houses, various tubes going in and out. Bright lights, gas and fluids are pumped into and around the little ones, sustaining their frail lives. In the non-intensive care section, an orphan infant, no more than 6 months old lies in her cot, writhing around silently.

But after a few days, amidst the sickness and desperation, I start to sense some hope and positivity. Mothers with tiny premature new-borns are able to breast feed for the first time. Grand-parents peer through the glass at babies who wouldn’t have survived in their era. This may not be the most glamorous of locations, but miracles are happening every day here.

Words of the day

  • ασθενοφόρο – ambulance – (as-then-o-foro)
  • δρόμος -road – (thro-mos)
  • Αθήνα -Athens – (ath-ee-na)
  • νοσοκομείο – hospital -(noss-o-kom-ee-o)

The Kalamata Hilton

Kalamata general hospital

The room service is great but the beds are tiny..

I think I know what it feels like to be a new-born. Right now I find myself in a completely alien environment, I have no idea what anybody is talking about and after 3 days of chronic sleep deprivation I have no concept of time and don’t know if I want to eat, sleep or just hide under a blanket.

Why the disorientation? It’s because I’m staying with T in the maternity ward of the hospital. We are together as a family unit for the very first time. She is absolutely fine, glowing, even, and despite the tiredness, a heavy fog of bliss hangs all around us. Unlike the UK, mothers are required to stay in the hospital for up to a week after delivery. There are no locum mid-wives in this part of the country, the area is too sparsely populated, so they make sure baby and mother are fighting fit before they release you back into the world. But our enforced stay, instead of feeling like a prison term, has manifested multiple unexpected benefits.

For a start, the Kalamata easy going, way of doing things means that visiting hours are pretty much a moot concept. So I’ve been spending 24 hours with mum  and baby. There are two beds in our room. T quickly bonds with the other new mum, and the multitude of relatives that come streaming in. We exchange chocolates, sweets, Greek delicacies and a plethora of well wishes. I’ve never known so many different ways to say congratulations.

Apart from the bonhomie, another fringe benefit of the Kalamata Hilton is the 24/7 expert assistance on call. This small hospital has 17 mid-wives plus doctors of every speciality buzzing around. Our little guy didn’t turn up with a manual, so every  query, about bed, bum, boob or barf  is answered within seconds at the press of a red button. The Greek midwives are highly efficient, the deft dexterity of their baby ninja skills putting our cotton-wool fingers to shame. It’s a great relief to have these guys on board for the first few days.

As for the little guy. He does what babies do. Sleep, eat, look cute and supply us with hugs on demand.  So apart from the size of the bed I’m quite enjoying the hospitality here right now….


Words of the day

  • να ζήσει – live long (lit. may it live) – (na – zee-say)
  • να το χαίρεστε – a blessing (lit. may you enjoy your baby) – (na – toe – herr-ess-tay)
  • καλή τύχη – good luck – (kall-ee ti-hee)

In Greece, we kiss

The cutest

My son, Day Zero

Standing outside the delivery room, I hear the muffled, but unmistakeable cry of a newborn. My heart starts to pound. Surely, it must be…. there’s nobody else in there except T and the hospital staff. An eternity passes. The reason for my agonizing wait is because the Greek public health health deems anyone, apart from the mother and hospital staff, unworthy of witnessing the birth. I feel  disenfranchised and it’s tormenting me. I can hear him but I can’t see him. Is he OK? Is she alright?

A quarter of an hour goes by then the doors swing open. Two doctors present a tightly wrapped parcel for my inspection. Shades of pink, blue and olive skin. Matted thick black hair. A face wrinkled and twisted from the traumatic transition from womb to ward. He is beautiful. He is healthy. He is perfect. My whole body feels light. As my gift is ushered back into the sterilized ward, tears overwhelm the moment. I fight the urge  to blub even more and turn to γιαγιά (grandmother). We embrace and let the joy flow through us both.

Minutes later the double doors open again. Petrakos, the hulking obstetrician who has overseen ‘our’ pregnancy, grabs me by the shoulders and places his cheek next to mine. “In Greece, we kiss” he gently murmurs before disappearing down the corridor. A new chapter begins.

Words of the day

  • κλαίω – Ι cry – (clay-o)
  • μωρό – baby – (mor-o)
  • συγκινητικό – emotional – (si-kin-i-ti-ko)
  • γέννηση – birth – (yen-ee-see)
  • λουλούδια  -flowers – (loo-loo-thee-a)

Nothing ever happens..

A cloud lingers over the mountains during sunset

It’s all quiet on the western front. The baby’s due date has arrived and passed. The passage of time has slowed to a crawl as the inevitable seeems to become ever more elusive. It’s a kind of limbo-land that occasionally bubbles over with overwrought emotion and sometimes a few tears. On top of all this, my intermittent back problems have flared up again, reducing my mobility to that of an arthritic tortoise.

I’ve made a prediction that Mr Bump will arrive tomorrow. I’ve got nothing to base this on at all, it’s just a running joke to pass the time. Our biggest concern is that he will start his journey during the night. The prospect of a drive into the city in the wee hours isn’t exactly enthralling.

Other news, my boxes have finally arrived from the UK. I now have all my gadgets, books and camera equipment to keep me occupied in between bouts of nappy changing, vomit duties and the rest of it. I can’t wait to get out in the country and capture some of the stunning light shows, the landscape puts on at this time of year. Actually I can wait, waiting is all that’s going on right now….

Words of the day

  • πηδάω – I jump – (pee-thou)
  • πρώτος – first – (pro-toss)
  • δικός – mine – (thee-koss)




Cheese – resistance is futile

Cheese in Greek supermarket

Greeks consume more cheese per capita than any other nation on the planet

One of the more unexpected outcomes of recent evolutionary biology is lactose tolerance. Contrary to popular belief, the default condition for most mammals is an aversion to eating dairy products, as opposed to the wide spread acceptance that milk, cheese, yoghurt, ice cream etc have been a staple part of our diet since sabre-toothed tigers were chasing us up trees.

It makes sense if you think about it. We are genetically pre-programmed to become intolerant to lactose after weaning. When our infantile dependency on the breast ends, (some guys never grow out of this stage btw), we stop producing the enzyme lactase, which is necessary in order to digest milk based products. However, at some point in ancient history, humans, in their infinite wisdom decided that they knew better than nature.

In the West we take dairy products for granted, having a long history of cultivating dairy herds. Consequently, only a small number of northern Europeans, around 5%  have lactose intolerance. Contrast this with those of East-Asian descent and the proportion rises to around 90% of the population. You see, in the grand, cosmic scheme of things, we shouldn’t really be messing with the milk products of other animals. Let’s face it, donkey milk should be for donkeys ( although a neighbour here in Mani swears her hearty constitution depends entirely on ass-milk, if you pardon the phrase). Mouldy, fermented, rotten smelling, off-milk, should in reality produce reactions of disgust. Instead, the French consider their ripe, soft cheeses to be as much a part of their rich culture as poetry, fine art and beheading.

OK, so you might detect a slight anti-dairy bias. The truth is, I hail from semi-Asian descent and for a long time I’ve considered myself to have a perfectly valid mild form of lactose intolerance. Although I was brought up in the UK on Kelloggs Cornflakes, free milk at school, rubbery cheese sandwiches and strawberry yoghurts, deep down I’ve always suspected that dairy was not for me.

So imagine my shock when I discovered that Greece, per person, consumes more cheese than any other nation in the world. OMG, I’m in the cheese capital of the world! And it’s true. Cheese in Greece is as ubiquitous as olives, sunshine and moustaches. The ancients even credit one of their Gods, Aristaeus, a son of Apollo, with inventing cheese, and other luminaries such as Homer and Aristotle have been part of the grand cheese PR campaign ever since.

Half of the cheese consumed in Greece is feta. Made from sheep’s milk and served in parallel with the main course, feta comes in a thousand varieties and is eaten at any and every occasion. At meals here in Mani, a huge slab of feta take prides of place at the centre of the table, usually accompanied by another variety (because one type of cheese obviously isn’t enough). But feta can also be a meal in it’s own right; baked in the oven, grilled, or crumbled into any number of meat or veggie dishes. The most popular snack in Greece is known as τυρόπιτα (tiropita), translated quite un-poetically as ‘cheese-pie’. But cheese pie in Greece is a culture on its own right. It comes in so many variations you could probably eat a different recipe every day of the year.

So, how does someone who has a genetic predisposition against dairy products survive in a land where cheese is king. Well, the truth is, I’m actually starting to embrace my new cheesy life. One of the benefits of a dairy rich diet means that you don’t need to consume as much meat protein. I’ve been threatening to go vegetarian for years, and embracing cheese is a decent way to cut back on eating dead animals. Then there’s the cultural side of their culinary obsession. To not indulge in cheese consumption in Greece is a bit like being invited to Buckingham Palace and telling the Queen you don’t like tea. So, as the villainous Borg from Star Trek would say, “Why do you resist? Resistance is futile. Negotiation is irrelevant. You will be assimilated.” Oh, what the heck, “Waiter, one more cheese pie, parakalo, and bring me some cheese on the side”

Words of the day

  •  να είσαι καλά – be well (blessing) – (nassee -kallah)
  • εκκλησία – church -(ek-lee-see-ah)
  • καναπές – sofa – ( kan-a pess)

And now, the weather…

Beach at Stoupa covered in seaweed

Seaweed lies strewn across the beach at Stoupa after strong winds batter the Peloponnese

Being an Englishman through and through, one of my favourite past-times is to discuss at length, the current state of the weather, be it rain, shine, snow, clouds, or as is generally the case in my homeland, various shades of grey.

I can just about remember, about 100 years when I was running around in short trousers, how the years passed by, following a quaint and antiquated concept called ‘the seasons’. The idea was, the year was split into 4 parts, cold = winter, hot = summer, with some colourful bits in between. It was great fun. At Christmas time you could build snowmen, and school was often cancelled because somebody forgot to service the gas boiler. Likewise, in summer, I used to cycle to the beach every day, fish in rock pools and try to pluck up the courage to jump off the high rocks with the big boys.

I’m not sure what happened between then and now, but these days UK weather patterns seem to be a bit more like pressing ‘Shuffle’ on your iTunes. Let’s have a heatwave in October, or maybe a snow drift in the middle of March. So imagine my surprise when I find myself in a part of the world that still follows the old fashioned idea of a gradual change in seasons. That is exactly what’s going on in the bay of Messina right now.

I’d quite happily carry on with my daily beach dip year round, but in the last week I’ve had to twice cancel my Mediterranean bathing appointment due to an unfamiliar phenomena round here known as ‘clouds’. The temperature has dropped a degree or two as well, but although I keep hearing the mantra “krio, krio,” (cold) from the family, it’s clearly still shorts, T-shirt and flip-flop territory for a northern European like me.

Apart from the seasons however, there’s one striking qualitative difference about the weather in  Mani compared to what I’m used to. It’s called ‘drama’. And I’m not talking some gentle rom-com. This is real seat of the pants, hi-octane Hollywood action movie stuff.

The last couple of days have witnessed strong winds, whipping up the usual mirror-like seas into fields of froth. Yesterday at Kardamyli, we sat for lunch, yards from the sea. But instead of a gentle lapping against the shore, 6-foot breakers were crashing against the rocks. Later three surfers, excited by the waves, jumped on their boards and paddled out, egged on from cheers from the diners.

But the real showstopper came today.  Earlier in the afternoon, on our daily stroll, we stopped at 100 metre intervals (9-month pregant ladies aren’t the fastest movers) to gaze out to sea. In the distance thick, black clouds carpeted the sky whilst every 30 seconds, spikes of lightning prodded that ocean. But that was just the opening act. As I write, the aftermath of a storm in the Ionian Sea is literally shaking the house.  The night sky is lit up like a US bombing mission, shades of pink and blue as Zeus flexes his might. The electricity flickers on and off and I can feel the tempest heading towards us as. Please, T, don’t have a baby tonight…..

Words of the day

  • σύννεφα – clouds – (sin-eff-ah)
  • ρούχα – clothes – (roo-ha)
  • μαλλιά – hair – (pal-ee-ah)
  • περίπου- approximately/ more or less – (peh-rip-oo)
  • ενδιαφέρων – interesting – (edi-a-feh-ron)
  • αριθμός – number – (ah-rith-moss)
  • μήνας – month – (mee-nass)
  • λεπτό – minute – (lep-toe)
  • και άλλος – another – (keh-ah-loss)
  • βροχή – rain – (vro-hee)
  • ξεχνάω – I forget – (kse-h-now)
  • επόμενο – next – (e-pom-eh-no)



Water, water everywhere

Water truck

A truck full of water. I’ll never curse the rain again.

My country life is proving to be a continuous education. On Sunday I got up and turned on the tap to splash some water on my groggy face. Instead of a refreshing wake-me-up I was greeted by a shallow metallic groan, the sound of empty copper pipes straining for attention. Later at breakfast I discovered the reason why the pipes were calling out their own autumnal ballad. Essentially there was no more water.

Don’t get me wrong, this wasn’t an Ice Cold In Alex moment, where I had to find a cold beer to quench my thirst. We still had plenty of water to drink and upstairs there was enough to flush the toilets. But that was about it. The well, or rather the cistern, had run dry.

I felt like such a city boy. How can you run out of water? Surely it just comes out of a hole in the ground somewhere, or a river, or maybe from God?  It turns out that water politics in Mani run deep, if you forgive the pun. Our particular village has an issue with water supply. Although we live in the shadow of several mountains, all the freshwater runs off to the east side, which by all accounts has a bountiful supply. However, on the west side it’s a different story. No aquifers or fresh water springs to tap into here. Instead, when you run out, you call a man who arrives with a large truck and an even larger hose.

Even then, it’s not that simple. Sometimes the supply gets contaminated with sea water, so the sweet (fresh) water doesn’t taste all that sweet, meaning you have to get a separate supply for drinking, and watering the plants, and feeding the animals etc etc etc. Needless to say, it’s a precious commodity here, so you adapt your behaviour accordingly. Back in Blighty, I used to love taking luxurious baths, sometimes even forgetting I had run one  and letting it go cold. Here, it’s very different. Everything involving H20 is done in a measured way, from doing the dishes, to showering  and cooking. Water is scarce here and costs bucks. So you better make sure you use it wisely.


Words of the day

  • σαν – like (comparison) – (san)
  • προτιμώ – I prefer – (pro-ti-mo) 
  • βαρετό – boring – (va-re-toe)
  • χαλασμένο – broken – (hal-as-men-o)
  • χαζό -stupid- (ha-zo)
  • συνήθως – usually -(sin-ee-thos)
  • πληροφοριές – information -(plee-rof-0-ree-ez)